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  • Writer's pictureSusan Tatum

The New Retirement

with Marilyn Hintsa, Retirement Readiness Coach ULeadU

Retirement is one of the 10 most stressful transitions in life, and the idea of retirement is changing with the way of the world. Marilyn Hinsta is a Retirement Readiness Coach, sharing about finding fulfillment and purpose in your post-career path.

Notes from the Show

I’ve spoken with a lot of coaches but for the first time ever I am joined by a Retirement Readiness Coach, Marilyn Hintsa. Whether you’re nearing retirement age or your career is just beginning, it’s never too early to give retirement some thought.

With the changing landscape of the career world and the fact that we are living longer and longer, retirement definitely looks different and will probably continue to shift as time goes on. Retirement may no longer be a vacation home in Florida at 65…instead, it has become a chance to continue your own development, give back to your community, and seize the time you have left on the planet.

There are a lot of things to consider when thinking about your retirement: What are you going to do with all of your time? What is the money you’ve been saving all along going to support? How long will you be retired? Marilyn also covers 11 common “losses” people experience after transitioning to retirement, and how these themes can be used to guide retirement decisions.

Things that get lost when you leave work behind:

  1. Purpose

  2. Identity

  3. Structure and Routine

  4. Paycheck

  5. Status

  6. Power

  7. Recognition

  8. Community

  9. Companionship and Social life

  10. Mental Stimulation

  11. Achievement

Retirement is one of the 10 most stressful transitions in your life. You can ease this transition by planning, preparing, and shifting your mindset by hiring a retirement coach. You can reach out to Marilyn on her website, U Lead U.

What's Inside:

  • What is retirement in the 2020s?

  • What is a Retirement Readiness or Reset Coach?

  • When is the right time to start planning for retirement?

  • Common losses of leaving work behind.

Mentioned in this Episode:

Transcribed by AI Susan Tatum 0:37

Hello, everybody, welcome back to stop the noise. I'm Susan Tatum and today we're talking with Marilyn Hintsa, who is a retirement readiness coach. And she has a company call you lead you post career pathing. And I'm excited about this conversation today. Because I've not yet had a retirement coach on the show before. And I do want to say up front, I think there's things that if for some of the younger folks that are listening, and you're thinking, oh, god retirement on and you start talking about that yet, I do believe that you will find some interesting things in here. So stick with us. And welcome, Marilyn.

Marilyn Hintsa 1:14

Thank you. Thanks for inviting me, I'm happy to be here.

Susan Tatum 1:15

Do you want to take just, you know, 20 30 seconds or so and tell us briefly who you are and how you got there?

Marilyn Hintsa 1:22

Sure. So I trained as a leadership coach, and that started at the very beginning of the pandemic. And I decided after I'd finished my training that rather than becoming a leadership or executive coach, I really wanted to focus on people who are approaching retirement, because I'd seen people in my previous place of employment who stayed long before their best before dates. And I never understood why they didn't retired because they were well resourced, and they didn't seem really happy staying at the office. So the idea of retirement coaching just resonated more for me than going back into the corporate environment and doing leadership and executive coaching.

Susan Tatum 2:02

Why is it that people stay longer than they need to stay or should stay.

Marilyn Hintsa 2:06

Because they don't know what they're going to do next. And, you know, I mean, that's one big reason. They might stay longer, if they love their job, but that's a different story. They might stay longer, because their partner doesn't want them at home. They might stay longer, because their entire social world is is at work. So there's all kinds of reasons why people stick around.

Susan Tatum 2:28

So I guess that fear of the unknown to change would would come into that.

Marilyn Hintsa 2:32

Absolutely. 100%.

Susan Tatum 2:34

Well, so before we go any further into this, let me ask you what is retirement because it seems to me like the definition of retirement has changed quite a bit. And it means different things to different people.

Marilyn Hintsa 2:47

Absolutely. Which is why I called my company post career pathing instead of retirement pathing. Because I think that you've got a whole new life post career. It's not an ending by any means. And but right now, I think that the term is in a bit of an evolution. And so it means whatever you want it to mean, at this point. And that could be anything from a traditional view of retirement, which is kind of going out to pasture after you know, a long, many years of labor. Or it may be that you're you've decided you're going to work forever, because you so love your job. So retirement isn't an issue. And it can also be just you want a whole new way of life, you want to do something completely different for the for the last chapter of your life. And I think that baby boomers who have had such an impact on so much in our lives, you know, over the time we've been alive, that they're really pushing retirement to evolve to be much more of a regeneration than, than an ending. They're pushing it to be a time when you stay active and involved, you don't become irrelevant, because God knows baby boomers don't want to become irrelevant. And at a time of continued growth and development versus decline. And so I think it's moving towards a place where it's, it's a time, more about a chance to have a new way of living, and giving contributing back to our communities and our world that's purposeful, and is driven by a desire to get the most out of every day that we have left on this planet. I think that's where we're headed. And in 20 years, the word retirement may have no meaning to anybody. Because it may be just a continuation of life. Right?

Susan Tatum 4:30

Well, you hear about these people that are in their 30s and 40s. That and their their goal has been to retire at that age and, and do whatever they want to do. But it's the same thing regardless of what age you are. If you're, you're leaving one. You mean I guess you could be just changing careers.

Marilyn Hintsa 4:46

Absolutely. Yeah. And I think it's very like you know, during your career, you have a number of different transitions, some people more than others, if they switch change companies, change industries, all that sort of thing. Other people have fewer major transitions because they remain in the same sort of job at the same sort of company. But this is just another big transition. And it actually occurred to me just this morning that, you know, we spent like three or four years in business school, trying to get ready to go to work. But we don't spend three or four years at the end of our career thinking about how we're going to leap.

Susan Tatum 5:35

That is a really good point. So obviously, to me, there was there's the financial planning that that we do all hear about, like, do I have enough money that you that you would work with financial planners, I guess, for that kind of thing. And then, but you're talking about if I understand correctly, the non financial things that we should be addressing questions we should be asking, and, and coming up with a plan that what you know, I mean, maybe it's as simple as what do we do with our time?

Marilyn Hintsa 5:51

Yeah, absolutely. And I think, you know, that question of what do I do with my time is that where people start, they don't, nobody wants endless days with nothing to do. There's nothing more terrifying than that frankly.

And so it starts with that question of time. And it, it's very tied in, as you reach the end of your career to the financial planning, because you probably started saving early on in your career, with an eye towards retirement, but you didn't think about what that money was going to support. So if you are saving money, and you don't know what your life is going to be like, you're not really sure if you've got enough or too much. And if you start early enough thinking about what you want to do, then you can start either shoring up your finances or saying, Oh, I don't need to save anymore. I've done all I can do for the life that I want. So the two things are really tied together.

Susan Tatum 6:45

It's an interesting thing that, you know, you were talking about, you start saving early. And but I was reading something or somebody said something recently about the the kids that are like five and 10 years old, now, half of them can expect to live to be 100.

Marilyn Hintsa 7:02


Susan Tatum 7:03

So there, do you think that people will work longer? I mean, will we be healthier and wanting to work longer? Or does the time that we're not working become longer? I guess I guess both of that happens?

Marilyn Hintsa 7:18

Yeah, I think that we're already starting to work longer people realize that, you know, if they retire at, say, 65, they could easily live another 30, possibly 35 or 40 years, because we are already living into our hundreds. And I think that that's a long time. And people worry about whether their money is going to run out before their time does. And I do think that the the trend to work longer is tied to that desire to ensure that you have enough money to last you until you die. And I think that the younger people, again, will probably have more careers than we did. And will keep reinventing themselves as they get older. And so the time that they're retired may not really be so different than than what we experience. It might be shorter, it might go back to what it was 30 40 years ago, you know?

Susan Tatum 8:16

Yeah, I wouldn't want to have to predict anything.

Marilyn Hintsa 8:18

Yeah, no, no, exactly.

Susan Tatum 8:20

too much, too much.

Marilyn Hintsa 8:21

Sure enough.

Susan Tatum 8:22

So then what are the things that we talked about, what do I do with my time? What are the other things that we should be thinking about?

Marilyn Hintsa 8:32

Well, there's a whole bunch of things that get lost in the transition from working full time at a career to going into your post career life. And not everybody experiences all of these things, but they're the things that will will trip you up if you haven't thought about them. And if you'll bear with me, can I list off 11 of them?

Susan Tatum 8:56

Oh, okay. I'm taking notes put the things in the show notes

Marilyn Hintsa 9:02

Sure. That sounds great. So the big one is purpose work gives us a reason to get up in the morning. And that reason might be tied to supporting our family supporting ourselves. Something like that. So it's a strong purpose. You leave work behind, you need a purpose, because humans want to be purposeful. And we're not happy when we're not. Identity is a big one, if you've been a lawyer your entire life, and never done anything but law, and suddenly you're not a lawyer, who are you, that can be a, again, an identity crisis, at this stage of life. Structure and routine structure and routine, keep us grounded. As humans, as much as you know, we love to throw away routine, when we go on vacation. It's necessary. And when you take away the rhythm of the days that you had, when you were working, you need to replace it with a new rhythm, you need to find something that will give you that structure. A paycheck that's that's big. Status what do you do when you're not in the who's who anymore? You're just Who's that?. Power if you were in a powerful position, how do you replace whatever power gives you when you're no longer in that power position? powerful position, you know, maybe that's when you go into politics or something, I don't know. Recognition, you know, that recognition for Job well done the pat on the back that a specific accomplishment that you get a a bonus for, or, or even an award for having a really meritorious career, those are really big things, where's that gonna come from when you're not working anymore? Community belonging to a team belonging to a company having a professional network. Do you have community outside of work that's going to support you in the same way. Companionship and a social life, all those lunches and drinks after work? That's important. Mental stimulation, you know, learning new things, having to deal with new situations keeps our minds really active. And that, there's no reason we can't keep being that active. And for some people that's really important. And achievement, your meeting goals, you're getting advanced in your job, all that stuff. Where does that come from? When you when you leave retirement. And as I say, each of these, each person has a different priority that they would place on all of these things. So

Susan Tatum 11:17

the thing that strikes me, Marilyn, is that it's very emotional things that you listed. And it's just a many of which are tied to ego, I would think and so shame, yes. So now that you've scared the crap out of me about all these things? How do How does one go about doing this?

Marilyn Hintsa 11:38

Well, I would suggest a start sooner rather than later. So as soon as the idea of retirement starts, you know, showing up in your brain, start doing some reading, there's some great books that I'm happy to, you know, also put in the show notes for you that that will help you get started on on self reflection, just awareness of what this transition is like, for people, it's one of the most 10 most stressful transitions in life. So it does deserve some attention. Hiring a coach like me, because some of these are psychological things, as you pointed out, they're also mindset things. And so it's sometimes just a shift of mindset, and an understanding of why that thing is really important to you, and how you can get that feeling that you get when you have recognition or status in a different way. And understand that it's not necessarily tied just to the job you were doing. It may be connecting to things that were important to you when you were way younger, when you were starting out in your career, and bringing some of that back into your life.

Susan Tatum 12:45

So as a coach, are you because it because I've seen you know, lots of different kinds of coaches that coaches that are professionally capable of, I guess, teaching you a skill of how to play golf better, or something like that. Then there are coaches that help you think through this type of thing through and then there's coaches that have a framework that they can help you follow. Is that so when in your particular work with with these folks, what approach do you take to it?

Marilyn Hintsa 13:16

So I'm not teaching you a skill. I'm gonna I'm not going to teach you things because this is such a personal journey. And it's not the same for any two people. I'm, I am a coach trained in an inquiry type of process, I ask powerful questions to help you self reflect and discover things that maybe you hadn't thought of before, or hadn't thought about in a long time. I help you reconnect with what your core values are, the values that you've held your entire life and how those can support you with the next phase of life. I help you connect with your core strengths, the things that put you in a state of flow when you're using them. So that the things that you decide to do in retirement will allow you to live in alignment with your values, using your core strengths as much as possible. And I help with visioning, like I'm I create a safe environment for people to envision whatever they want without judgment. And in doing that, to get started on this journey, without any inhibitions about what's possible. So it's really about exploring what's possible, what your potential is, in a safe environment, where no one's going to judge what your ideas are. And then I will provide, you know, resources, and I will do some exercises with people to help them on this journey.

Susan Tatum 14:44

Then ultimately do do your clients come away with a with a plan that they're going to work into

Marilyn Hintsa 14:51

ideally, they might still go away. That is the goal. And I try and mix the the exercises that can create the plan, with the sort of deeper work on values and, and strengths that support the plan. Along with that, what I call sort of the daydreaming part of this, which is just let your mind explore and go wherever it goes, and see what happens. But, you know, if you start three to five years ahead, you can create a plan, but in all likelihood over that time period, it's going to change a few times. And even if you start, you know, shortly after you retire, you may create a plan. But, you know, all plans change. And and so the plan isn't as important as recognizing the things that are really going to make this a wonderful time of life for you.

Susan Tatum 15:47

I think that I think that's a good point. And it's the same thing, you know, that they say about business planning that the planning itself is the most important part of it, because it made you consider everything that that was there.

Marilyn Hintsa 16:01


Susan Tatum 16:01

We certainly know now that things can change in a heartbeat. And we you can't you've got to be flexible with your plan.

Marilyn Hintsa 16:08

For sure.

Susan Tatum 16:09

And I think you've got it all planned out. And then COVID comes along.

Marilyn Hintsa 16:12

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And you know, I think COVID was a really interesting time for people who are close to retirement or thinking about retirement because almost, it almost put them in that place where they're without their normal community there without the same structure. And even meeting on Zoom puts you in a different position, status wise and power wise. It creates more equality. So I think it was a really interesting experiment for people who are considering retirement.

Susan Tatum 16:44

Yeah, it's a it's a, it's an interesting topic. What we I think that you already went through this, what led you to get into this, this particular niche? Because I don't I just don't know of that many retirement coaches. And I think it's a sign of that, oh, you know, you, you talked about baby boomers and the baby boomers are not going to go away quietly. But you know, what, I also see more willingness to work together, the baby boomers and the younger generations and respect each other's skills and talents. And, you know, the younger folks understanding technology the way they do and different ways of communicating and then the and then the older ones have been through all the stuff before, in one way or another, and when the two work together, it's just much more powerful that we're willing to learn from each other.

Marilyn Hintsa 17:39

Yeah, I think it's awesome. And, you know, I think that that's also a great opportunity for people who want to have an impact in their, in their retirement or the latter years of their career to work with young people who are either entering the workforce or, or are reaching their, you know, the height of their careers, to mentor them and to learn from them as much as they're, they're learning from the older person.

Susan Tatum 18:05

So do you mind mentioning a few of the books that you were? You were talking about?

Marilyn Hintsa 18:10

Sure, yeah. So I've got three. One, I would say is practical advice, plus exercises and reflections. And it's written by a Canadian guy named Mike Drak D R A K and he's got two ones called retirement heaven, or retirement hell, it's your choice. And that one has some really great reflective questions that will get anybody's you know, brain thinking about these issues. And then he's just brought out a new one called longevity lifestyle by design, which he's actually offering at no cost for a download of an ebook. And it comes with a bunch of worksheets and exercises that you can do. So I really liked Mike's books, because because they're really practical. Another one that I really like, and this one is kind of geared towards high achievers who want to keep achieving. And it's called from strength to strength. And it's written by Arthur C. Brooks, who has been a columnist for The Atlantic magazine. And he wrote a Happiness column. So in some ways, this book is about finding happiness by finding purpose. And then the last one is written by a woman. It seems most of these books are written by men. But her name is Barbara Bradley Haggerty. And this really focuses on her journey, as she's coming into midlife to. And she she defines midlife as sort of 40 to 70. So it's a broad range, but her research and everything else to understand purpose and its importance in our life, and ultimately, to discover her own purpose in this stage of her life and beyond. And it's called Life reimagined, the science, art, and opportunity of midlife.

Susan Tatum 20:00

Okay, Those all sound interesting.

Marilyn Hintsa 20:01

They're all very interesting. And they all contain, you know, examples of people who've gone before, people you know, successful people, retirees, or people, people who've done a whole lot of stuff in this stage of their life and what that's all about? Yeah.

Susan Tatum 20:18

I think it's, you know, it's interesting when you talked about the longevity, lifestyle by design. That's something that I think really, the I guess every every generation has advantages over the previous generations in terms of what's been learned about the things you should eat and the exercise that you need. And the, you know, just medical issues that but if you, I guess, advice that I would give to Well, I've always been pretty active and fairly good about eating, there's, you know, I could probably drink one fewer glass of wine every now and then. I think that it's to take that stuff seriously, at a younger age, because you can plan your life if you just if you just think about it. Take the time to think about it.

Marilyn Hintsa 21:01

Yeah, absolutely. And that whole part of maintaining your health and the trying to stay fit is is really important. And the sooner you start doing that, the better. But at the same time, a lot of people when they retire, say that's what they're going to do. Now I can go to the gym every day. Now I can really think about what I'm eating, you know, now I can cut down on the number of glasses of wine I have and it becomes a goal and therefore also a point of purpose. And Mike Drak, the guy who's written these two books, he's now been training for a triathlon. He's 68 years old. And he was never somebody who really was was into that sort of thing until he decided to retire.

Susan Tatum 21:39

That's excellent. Well, this has been very interesting Marilyn. Thank you so much for, for sharing your thoughts for the folks that want to follow up with you. What's a good way for them to get in touch?

Marilyn Hintsa 21:50

They can check out my web website, which is www.ulead There's a letter U L E A D letter U dossier and there's a they can book a discovery call with me from my website. They can find me on LinkedIn if they just search my name Marilyn Hintsa. I'm the only one there who? I think I'm the only one there. But I'm certainly the only one who's a retirement coach.

Susan Tatum 22:20

Well, and for those, those who are listening in and don't have a chance to look at the show notes. That's HINTSA. So all right, well, thank you again. And I'm going to I'm going to check out a few of these books and I may follow up with some questions for you.

Marilyn Hintsa 22:34

Awesome, thank you so much. This was really fun.

Susan Tatum 22:36

Have a great day.



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